20 Self-Care Practices For the Mind, Body & Soul

"How are you?" This is a question that gets asked frequently in many of our conversations. 

Busy. Tired. Anxious. Overwhelmed. These are the words I often hear (and say) in response to that question.

We all experience these feelings of weariness or disorientation. When we are living lives filled with activity, noise, and hurry, it is incredibly difficult to feel healthy and rested. When that is our overall experience with life, the result is that we become stressed and burned out.

In order to nurture the health of our mind, body, and soul, we need ways to recenter and restore. We need these in short spurts throughout the day, and also longer stretches. With a bit of self-care, you can experience more joy, rest, and soul-health.

Here are 20 self-care practices for your mind, body & soul:

1. Simplify your schedule. Are you over-committed? Ask yourself which activities are truly adding value to your life, and thoughtfully make space for those things.
2. Do something that energizes your body. Stretch, swim, run, do yoga, or whatever physical activity you enjoy.
3. Take a long, warm bath. While you're at it, light a candle, read a magazine, listen to soothing music. 
4. Create a Gratitude List. Write down all the things that you're thankful for. 
5. Get a massage. Enjoy it.
6. Unplug for a day. Go on a media and tech fast, and turn off the electronic devices.
7. Stretch. Find the kinks and tension spots in you body, and stretch them out.
8. Do something new. Have you been considering learning a new skill or trying a new hobby? Go for it. 
9. Practice mini-meditation. Begin or end your day with a minute of deep breathing, and focused awareness of your body, thoughts, and feelings.
10. Dance it out. Put on your favorite dance music, and shake your body.
11. Write or journal your thoughts. Take 10 minutes, and jot down whatever is on your mind. Mentally release those things as you write.
12. Get quality time with a quality person. Hang out with someone who you love. If they're far away, give them a phone call.
13. Be still. Find a quiet place outside, and embrace the stillness.
14. Practice a full day of Sabbath rest. Take a full day to rest and rejuvenate.
15. De-clutter. Choose a place - your email inbox, your desk, a closet - and get rid of the excess and junk.
16. Do an activity mindfully and slowly. Savor the moment, and experience your activity with attentiveness. 
17. Take a walk. Explore your area at a leisurely pace.
18. Reflect on your personal mission statement. If you don't have a personal mission statement, create one. 
19. Enjoy a piece of chocolate or a glass of wine. Better yet, enjoy both together.
20. Sleep. Take a nap, go to bed earlier, give your body some extra rest.

What is one thing you can do today to practice self-care?

This post is also on my Spiritual Journey blog, where I write about the spiritual journey.

The Joy of Simplifying and Letting Go

Do you feel like there is too much to do, and not enough time to do it? Do you feel overwhelmed, like you don't have enough time or space in your life?

Maybe you need to simplify. Maybe you need to let go.

A shaping principle of my life is this: identify the "main things," and put those in first. In other words, determine what is most important to you. Your family relationships? Your faith? Your job? A particular project? Learning a new skill? Put those main things into your life, and fit the smaller, less important things around those. 

There may be things that are on your To Do List that you may need to let go. Because guess what? We don't have unlimited time and energy. We have particular units of time (days, weeks, months), and therefore have to choose how we spend that time. 

Last week I did a thorough overhaul of my clothes closet and dresser. I emptied both out completely, and began a process of deciding what to keep and what to let go. I kept only what gave me a sense of joy - clothes that I actually wear, clothes that I truly enjoy. In the end, I had two garbage bags filled with stuff that I gave away. The result was a closet and dresser that were simplified, decluttered, and only contained things worth keeping. 

"Keep only those things that speak to your heart. Then take the plunge and discard all the rest." - Marie Kondo

I believe that same process can be helpful as we think about our tasks and responsibilities. Let's be thoughtful about what we make time for.

There are all sorts of obligations and errands to do. There is an endless barrage of information, articles, TV shows, and emails that could fill our time. If we're not mindful, those things could completely overwhelm us and rob us of tending to what really matters.

Each day I have the capacity to do a particular amount of tasks. Today, for instance, my main things are: make a big batch of chili, do 30 minutes of yoga, do work email, write a blog post.

Those are on my To Do List. There are other things that I hope I can do, but may need to let them go (at least for now). For those items, I put them on a Maybe To Do List or a Do Not Do List. These two lists only exist in my mind, but perhaps I really should write them down as a practice of mindfulness. In any case, I need to let go of things that won't realistically fit into my day. These include take a nap (Maybe To Do...it sounds lovely), read all the articles in Feedly (Do Not Do. In fact, I'd love to declutter Feedly by unsubscribing from a bunch of things), clean the fridge (Maybe To Do...because really, who cares?).

For me, simplifying and letting go is a necessary practice. It allows me to be truly present to what is most important, to experience life with joy and freedom, and to be a good steward of my time and energy.

Happy Things for the Solo Parent

Steve is away this week on a work trip. He usually has these trips about once a month, so we're learning how to make it work with our family life. On my end, even though we've done this a few times, I still need to intentionally find ways to help the kids and myself thrive. Here are a few happy things I've been doing this week to enjoy the solo parenting:

1. Go on a walk with my toddler.

2. Take a trip to Starbucks and guiltlessly splurge for a gingerbread latte.

3. Try a new haircut. 

4. Bake and cook with the kids. Aaron wanted to make mochi, so that's our fun activity for this afternoon. 

5. Facetime or text with Steve when I need to connect with my faraway spouse. 

6. Do spontaneous things with the kids. Unplanned trip to Costco because the kids enjoy the samples...why not? Say yes to things they want to do (unless it's Aaron asking if I will play the card game War with him. Then it is ALWAYS no.)

7. Have lots of story time with the kids on the couch. 

8. Take naps while my toddler naps. 

9. Ask a friend to watch the kids so I can be alone for a few hours. 

10. Cook simple, quick meals.

11. Go to sleep earlier than usual. 

12. Connect with friends who get me.

13. Watch Top Chef, Parenthood, or other fun, mindless TV.
14. Be okay with less showers, messier floors, and dirty laundry.

15. Stretch and do yoga. 

16. Give kids some crayons, Scotch tape, and paper. Let them create!

17. Read.

18. Take a few deep breaths and let go of expectations for how things "should go."

Empty Yet Full

"I feel like I have very little energy, but still so much to give."

This is what I told a friend the other day while we chatted on the phone.

Physically, I am downright tired. Halfway through this pregnancy with our third child, I am waddling around with a heavy belly. Every movement takes more effort, sleep is an uncomfortable battle, and I need to muster up all my internal resources to just make it through the day. After our two kids get into bed, and the dishes are done, and I can finally just lay down, I feel spent.

And yet...

There is something happening in the deeper parts of me that is energizing. I feel my spirit filling and stirring with love and joy and hope. I have a growing sense of vision for my own life, and a confidence that I have so much to pour into other people. When I think about our growing family, relationships with friends and neighbors, and even interactions with strangers, I get excited about the possibilities of experiencing more of this love, joy, and hope. And I feel certain that the pool of resources doesn't come from me, but that I have unlimited access to it.

"If anyone is thirsty, let him come to me and drink." This is the invitation that reverberates in my soul these days. Embrace your emptiness, and be filled.

And as it goes from a nice thought to an experienced reality, the invitation and Inviter seems like the best gift I could ever dream of receiving.

True Belonging

In two months our family will ship a car and large container over the Pacific Ocean, crossing our fingers that our things will arrive in Hawaii without being lost at sea. We will board an airplane, and for several hours in the sky, have no geographical place to call home. We’ll be leaving the familiar, on our way to the new, and momentarily living in-between.

The image that comes to mind is that of Dorothy, being caught up in a great cyclone, and swept from Kansas into the mysterious Land of Oz. In the cyclone itself is chaos, uncertainty, and disengagement. But it is the very thing that brings Dorothy to new discoveries of the world and herself. 

A year and a half ago, our decision to move our family to a new place was catalyzed, in significant part, to an image of a ship being steered into fog. And here we begin to find ourselves, in a fog headed toward a new place.

In this interim and in-between, I sense a divine invitation to find my belonging not in a particular place or to a particular people, but to find it in God. Because isn’t that the deeper reality? Our true belonging is found in God. In him we abide and nestle, and are held in eternal security. Everything else is volatile and perishable.

But to believe in my belonging is a challenge. I have become rooted to many things and people. I know who I am in this current place. To leave that means to dismantle and disidentify. And that takes some courage.

Instead of hustling about to create my own makeshift place of belonging, I am choosing to dwell in this neutral zone of transition. I am embracing an emptying for the sake of making space for reliance and dependence on God. I am abiding in Him, and finding rest and peace and joy.

I am letting go, and with hope, believing that I belong to a God who is good and trustworthy.

Rhythm For Life

We all have rhythms in our lives. 

Some of them happen naturally, like the rhythm of eating breakfast in the morning. Other rhythms take intentionality and discipline, like the rhythm of spending time with a friend who lives farther away. 

A "rhythm for life" is a simple statement of personal rhythms that you choose to practice to intentionally center your life on what is important to you.

If we want a certain kind of life, it's the daily and weekly rhythms that will determine whether or not that life actually becomes your reality. 

For instance, I want to be as physically healthy as possible. Rhythms that help my physical health include sleeping about 7-8 hours per night, doing physical activity like yoga or running, eating vegetables, having one day a week of rest. These are the things that nurture my physical health, and so I choose to practice these rhythms. 

A side note about health - our physical, mental, emotional, social health are very much interconnected. If we're nurturing one area of our lives, then oftentimes other areas are effectively nurtured.

When was the last time you considered your own life rhythms? Are you satisfied with them? Is there an area of your life where you want to change particular rhythms? Consider developing some personal rhythms for life that create space for what you want to do and who you want to be.

Creating a Rhythm for Life

The following reflections can help you develop a rhythm of life:

1. Who do you want to become? What is most important to you? What do you currently do to realize your goals and longings?
2. What practices and rhythms help you thrive spiritually, emotionally, physically, mentally? What hinders you? What is most life-giving to you?
3. Choose several rhythms or disciplines that arise from your desire for your life that suit your limits and realities. Begin your practice. 

Your rhythm for life can (and should) change when it begins to not fit. Life is full of transitions. Allow your rhythm for life to evolve as you grow and change. 

My Rhythm for Life

This isn't by any means extensive, but it captures some of the primary rhythms that are important for me right now:

• Begin and end each day with a quiet moment with God.
• Go through my Daily Checklist. 
• Stretch and do yoga.
• Read and reflect on Journey to the Cross, a Lent devotional. 
• Go for a run 2-3 times per week.
• Have regular dates with my husband.
• Meet with my spiritual director once a month.
• Have a weekly Sabbath.
• Talk and pray with Chante every two weeks. 

A Letter to Myself On My 33rd Birthday

Dear Larissa, 

Happy 33rd birthday!

You're in your THIRTIES - a vague time period that, as a kid, seemed to sing of old, moderately disillusioned lady teachers wearing pearls and frocks. Clearly that was a weird, immature perception. Your thirties have been awesome.

This year you enjoyed a whole lot of parenting moments, spiritual formation, and risk taking. With learning how to do life with a part-time ministry job, two young kids, a husband in full-time ministry, living in community with seven other friends, and planting a missional church, it has been abundant with chaos, messiness, adventure, and fun. Life is stretching you to grow in grace and humility.

In fact, a lot of this year has been characterized by embracing imperfection and experiencing God's grace. You consider yourself a recovering perfectionist, which involves accepting how things are rather than how you imagine they should be. Your kids help this process along, constantly reminding you that joy and sacred moments and creativity can be found in engaging with the present moment.

Also, you are learning how vital the habit of gratitude is. The simple practice of gratefulness continues to deepen your joy, contentment, and peace. Especially during those days when you have fussy children, a pile of laundry to do, and the inclination to tear your hair out.

You're a little more authentic and courageous these days. Believing more and more in your inherent value and worth, you're less prone to insecurity and fear. You are taking more risks as a leader, making decisions out of conviction, and more free from what others may think of you. Less mom fear, and more just being a mom. If this is the trajectory that comes with progressing in age, then bring it on!

You and Steve are smack dab in the middle of making some pretty major life transitions. This has been both frightening and exhilarating, and has been such an area of growth and partnership in your marriage. I wonder if, years later, this will be a year that was particularly foundational and catalytic for "the rest of your life." It has been a time rich with God's tangible and supernatural presence and voice.

There is so much to be grateful for. Two healthy, joy-filled, unique children. A marriage that is a relationship of vulnerability, faith, and partnership. An expanding vision for how our lives might fit into God's greater purposes. Friendships that are life-giving and faith-expanding. A God who is kind, good, and with you in every moment of every day.

- Larissa

Today was a good day. Here's what you did:

Ate pumpkin chocolate chip cookies for breakfast

Fancied up the nails

 Lounged with these two munchkins

Drank a rose water martini

Bought some cute, comfy pewter flats

Had caramel brownies for dessert

Simple, Slow & Sacred Christmas

Here we are in the throes of the Christmas season.

For many of us, December brings ramped up schedules, lots of holiday parties, an overload of sugar, and some brand new toys to play with. The month can easily become a frenzy of activity and stuff.

But it doesn't really need to be that way. We can slow down to enjoy the Advent season. We can be present to the people around us, and be present to God's deeper story behind all the tinsel and flashy lights.

This week, in a conversation with my spiritual director, I exclaimed, "I made a conscious decision to NOT do a big gingerbread house project with my kids!" She laughed, completely understanding that this was a thing to celebrate.

In a moment when I could have given in to the pressure to be Super Mom who does Pinterest-worthy crafts, I was able to choose to be more present to my kids. I had the self-awareness that doing a huge, messy baking endeavor (while possibly fun) would have probably resulted in more stress than it was worth.

So that's how I'm doing the holidays this month, friends. Simple and slower. This is a very intentional choice, which I believe will lead to greater levels of joy. For those who want to join me in the spirit of a Simple, Slow & Sacred Christmas, here are a few essential disciplines that I am practicing:

My 8 Rules for a Simple, Slow & Sacred Christmas

1. Do less. Focus on what is really important, and let go of the other stuff. Make space for quiet and rest.

2. Eat slowly. Instead of eating on-the-go, or cramming down food at parties, eat mindfully. Enjoy and appreciate food. Savor the good stuff.

3. Be present. Rather than thinking about something that you need to do, or something that is going to happen, stay focused on the present moment. Be present to the people, actions, and environment around you.

4. Say no. You do not need to attend every event or participate in every activity. Enjoy the things you want to say yes to, and be free to say no to the extras. I am intentionally saying no to shopping malls, long to-do lists, Pinterest, and activities that feel obligatory.

5. Create sacred places or times of reflection. I've been reading through a Advent devotional called Embrace the Coming Light by my friend Eddy Ekmekji. We have an Advent candle that we light at dinnertime, and our family has been talking together about what each candle symbolizes. Build in times to reflect on God's presence and activity throughout the month.

6. Unplug. When we're constantly connected to email and internet, there are many interruptions and demands. Disconnect from TV, internet, and smart phones for a while. Have a daily media fast.

7. Focus on people. Attention can be drawn elsewhere, even when there are people right there in front of you. Connect with friends and family, and actually engage with them.

8. Single-task. Do one thing at a time. Enjoy it. Breathe.

Overnight Gooey Cinnamon Rolls

I'm embracing life as a mother of two young kids. What does that mean, you ask? It means that on most days, I am wearing pajamas all day, quickly tying my unwashed hair into a messy bun, doing never-ending laundry, drinking extra coffee to get through the day, stepping over Legos and squeaky baby toys, having conversations that are constantly being interrupted, shoveling food into my mouth because I don't have time for a leisurely meal, ordering toiletry items from Amazon because the thought of driving with the kids to a store just for toothpaste is overwhelming, and crashing into bed by 10:00pm to maximize sleep before the baby wakes to feed again. My life is messy, and I'm kind of enjoying it.

And somehow, in the midst of the messy, sometimes there is enough time to slow down and make things like cinnamon rolls. Cinnamon rolls are the kind of thing that reminds you that life is good. As they bake, they fill the house with rich scents of bread and cinnamon. They are soft and sweet, and make for a delicious breakfast for everyone to enjoy.

The dough is the same bread recipe as these dinner rolls. In fact, I've used this dough to make pizza crust as well. Just mix the dough together, and let it sit in the fridge for up to 4 days. Most cinnamon roll recipes include icing, but I like these without additional sugar. They are plenty sweet as they are!

Overnight Gooey Cinnamon Rolls

print this recipe  

1 cup warm water (105-115 degrees)

2 packets active dry yeast 

1/2 cup butter, melted

1/2 cup sugar

3 eggs

1 teaspoon salt

4 to 4 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup brown sugar
1 tablespoon ground cinnamon
1/2 cup butter, softened 

Combine warm water and yeast in a large bowl. Let mixture stand until yeast is foamy, about 5 minutes. Stir in butter, sugar, eggs and salt. Beat in flour, 1 cup at a time, until dough is too stiff to mix (some flour may not be needed). Cover and refrigerate 2 hours or up to 4 days. Grease a 13X9 inch baking pan. Turn the chilled dough out onto a lightly floured board. Cover the dough with plastic wrap, and let rest for 10 minutes. Meanwhile, in a small bowl, mix together brown sugar and cinnamon, and set aside. Roll the dough out into a 12x9 inch rectangle. Spread butter over entire surface of the dough. Sprinkle the brown sugar mixture evenly over the butter. Roll up dough, and pinch seam to seal. Cut into 12 equal size rolls, and place cut side up into the pan. Cover, and let rise until doubled, about an hour. Bake at 375 degrees for about 20 minutes. Makes 12 rolls.

Our Life in Photos

 Nap time for the girls.

 We've been enjoying our Yonanas, which (despite its laughably stupid name) makes amazing soft-serve ice cream out of frozen bananas. It wins in our home for best single-purpose appliance.

 This photo captures their current sibling relationship: Aaron smothering his sister with affection, and Alex longing to be rescued out of his clutches.

 Trip to North Shore to watch surfers and sea turtles, and eat shave ice.

 "I will sock your face in."

 It seems like there is a gorgeous rainbow here every week, making nasty Oahu traffic more bearable.

A rare non-blurry, non-awkward photo of my precious daughter.

Today I Am Grateful For...

"He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, 

but rejoices for those which he has." 

- Epictetus

...books that feel like an old friend

...longer stretches of nighttime sleep for Alex and me (yipee!)

...creative writing inspiration

...phone conversations with old friends

...potluck dinner with new friends

...a simmering pot of beef stew

...impromptu family dance parties

...being able to finally exercise again

My Breakfast

My morning breakfast.

Coffee. Bold, strong, with a touch of half & half. To wake me from my dazed state, and remind me to slow down and partake in small joys.

Oatmeal. Coach's Oats with dried cherries and toasted walnuts. To start the day with a simple, healthy meal full of warmth and comfort.

Journal and a pen. So I can jot down my thoughts, speak with God, and focus on the important things before the day gets too cluttered with other stuff.

What do you have for breakfast?

Hawaii Highlights

We have been on Oahu, Hawaii for a month now, and are enjoying our time here. There are tons of things to do, and we find ourselves keeping more physically active. 

Our daily routine seems to have formed into leisurely breakfast, morning outing (usually involving the beach or a walk around the neighborhood), lunch at home, afternoon naps, dinner, get Aaron to bed, free time for the parents (either watching an episode of Breaking Bad, a movie, or reading), and crash into a deep slumber. Steve and I are both in awe of how much sleep we are getting here, which is probably a testament to just how tired we both have been for the last few months or years. 

Other highlights from Hawaii:

Shave ice, one of Hawaii's favorite desserts. We are loyal customers of Waiola's Shave Ice, where they serve amazing powdery ice covered in fruity syrups and condensed milk. Perfect afternoon treat on a hot summer day.

Loads of books from the nearby public library. Reminiscent of my adolescent years, I have a constant mountain of books sitting around the house. With more free time these days, I'm reading about 2-3 books a week. It's heaven.

Every few days we go to the beach, which is a short three blocks away from our apartment. We play in the sand and waves, soak in the sun, and let life's worries melt away.

We got to meet Hawaii's Governor Neil Abercrombie at the State Capitol. My mom works for Governor Abercrombie as the newly appointed Director of Executive Office of Early Learning. In layman's terms, she oversees the state's preschools and early education system, and is the coolest.

Breathtaking sunsets. Here we are, enjoying the view from a dinner cruise boat.

Living Simply

While on sabbatical, one of the disciplines I've been practicing is simplicity.

By nature of taking a hiatus from work, I am more conscious than ever of the complexities and clutter that have filled my life. With some intentional choices, I've been ruthlessly eliminating some of the excess stuff. It also helps that we are spending our sabbatical in a completely different place, and had to carefully decide what to pack and bring with us on our trip from California to Hawaii.

Here are a few ways I have simplified in the last few weeks:

Less stuff. We tried to pack as little as possible for our trip. It is amazing how one must simplify when packing everything into a suitcase and carry on. Aside from basic clothes, we brought a few toys for Aaron, some baby things for when Alexandra arrives, several books, and our computer. We also intentionally decided to rent a smaller apartment in Hawaii, assuming that if we had less space, we wouldn't accumulate as much.

More borrowing. Once we arrived in Hawaii, we borrowed as much as we could. Even though we are renting a place that was fully furnished, we still needed various items, such as kitchen utensils, some fans for the hot summer days, and trash cans. These we borrowed from generous family members. We also were able to snag all kinds of kid/baby items like car seats, a portable crib, and a stroller from friends.

Reading books. In this age of high-tech gadgets and electronic stimulus, reading a book is a way that I regularly practice simple living. On my first trip to the local library, I stocked up on Hawaiian culinary books and a few international bestsellers (including the beautiful Balzac and the Little Chinese Seamstress). Reading during the quiet evenings has been a refreshing activity.

Less television, internet & other media. Back in LA, we enjoyed our high-definition TV, Dish Network, and DVR. Now we have a less-than-amazing TV and basic cable. Steve and I have both whittled away at online clutter; we put vacation modes on our regular email addresses, severely limited our Facebook privacy settings, and unsubscribed to a majority of email lists. With less TV and internet activity, we frequently find other activities to do in the evenings, like work on a 1000-piece puzzle. Or go to bed earlier to match the sleep rhythms of our up-at-six-in-the-morning child.

Single-tasking, not multi-tasking. I am usually doing several things at once, like simultaneously checking Facebook or email on my iPhone, cooking dinner, and cleaning a path amidst Aaron's toys. During sabbatical, however, I am making a conscious effort to do one thing at a time. As I do this, I feel less frenetic, and have the ability to more fully enjoy simple things like cooking a meal, doing the laundry, or walking around the neighborhood.

Focused time with people. As a family, we are enjoying more time together, without distractions. We also have regular times with extended family and church community here, allowing us to have unhurried, leisurely time with others. If I'm playing with Aaron, I try to do just that - enjoy spending uninterrupted time with him. Maybe this is simple for others, but for me, sometimes it is an act of discipline. Playtime with a young kid often feels unproductive and even boring (especially when I am asked to read the same I Spy book for the fifth time in a row). My mind tends to wander, and I soon find myself wanting to do other things. But as I choose to focus solely on spending time with him, I soak in the moment of simply being with my son, and living in the present with him.

As I simplify the external clutter around me, my internal reality is becoming freed from clutter as well. Hurry, busyness, and anxiety have begun to dissipate, and are gradually being replaced by more joy and peace. It is a slow, steady process, but a process that I welcome.

Hawaii Highlights

We made it to Hawaii, our official residence for the next six months!

It was quite a journey to get here. Five hours on a plane with a three-year-old kid was an adventure that involved lots of snacks, silly parent statements like "We're almost there...only two hours to go!,' and a horrifying moment of Aaron peeing ALL OVER his airplane seat just as we were about to exit the plane. But since the trip ended with us arriving safely to our new home in Waikiki, we really can't complain much.

Okay, on to the highlights...

• Our Waikiki apartment. It is within walking distance of all sorts of great places, namely the world-famous Waikiki Beach. That photo up there? Yeah, that's our new neighborhood. If that's not enough, there's the nearby Honolulu Zoo, aquarium, a library, the Ala Wai canal, and endless Hawaiian eateries. The apartment itself is a simple, two-bedroom unit, which is a perfect size for us and our minimal belongings.

• The glorious food! We have our favorite local places - Waiola's Shave Ice, Goma Tei, Leonard's Bakery (for more yumminess, read my post of Top Ten Places to Eat on Oahu). Beyond the array of global cuisine, I'm also loving the fresh produce. The nearby farmer's market offers locally grown items like mangoes, purple sweet potatoes, pineapples, lychees, and sweet onions. It is a produce paradise.

• The Hawaii weather that is pretty much always 80 degrees and sunny. Every day is beach day here.

• Living at a slower, simpler pace. Life in Hawaii is generally less hurried, with a value for relationships, community, and leisure. As we settle in here, I am realizing that my body and soul are gradually detoxing from my busied, efficient, constantly on the go self.

The Gift of Sabbatical

I want to share more about this mysterious sabbatical that I mentioned briefly about a week ago in my post about Hawaii.

For the last 10 years, Steve and I have worked as college ministers for a Christian organization at the University of Southern California. Recently, we applied and were granted a 6-month paid sabbatical from our organization.

Based on the biblical value of sabbath or "ceasing from work," we are going to spend the next half year taking a hiatus from our work as ministers. Our primary hope for the sabbatical is that we would experience spiritual renewal and restoration. It will be a time for us to connect more deeply with God, each other, and family.

Unto that end, we will be leaving Los Angeles, and spending the sabbatical in Hawaii. We chose Hawaii because of its slower, more restful environment, and also because we want to have extended time with family (namely, my parents and extended family). While we are there, we hope to cultivate healthy rhythms of physical rest, exercise, and spiritual formation. We each have specific activities that we want to do - Steve wants to go hiking, I'd like to do some writing, we both have some books to read, Aaron will be in a great preschool program. As we transition to being a family of four with a newborn (yes, Alexandra will be born in Hawaii during the sabbatical!), we're also anticipating it being a special time for our relationships within our family.

As we prepare for our sabbatical, I am very aware of many things to be grateful to God for. I'm grateful to be a part of an organization that generously gives sabbaticals and values the nurturing of our spiritual health. I'm grateful for our ministry partners at USC who will take on more primary leadership roles while Steve and I are away. I'm grateful for the chance to spend time at home in Hawaii, where we can have lots of time for the outdoors, great weather, and time with ohana. I'm grateful for the gift of rest.

Retreat

I spent the weekend on a personal retreat on Catalina Island.

Two full days of silence, solitude, and just being.

It was rainy for most of my time there, but I didn't mind one bit. I spent my time curled up in blankets, alternating between reading, writing, praying, napping, and doing absolutely nothing.

My mind, body and spirit are feeling refreshed and restored!

Away on Vacation

In celebration of our five-year wedding anniversary, Steve and I are jetting away tomorrow to the Caribbean for a week-long cruise. Steve's amazingly generous parents are having Aaron stay with them. Let's hear it for the grandparents! And for my husband, who scores great travel deals and coordinates all the details!

An entire glorious week with zero kids, no responsibilities, very few plans, lots of sunny weather, dressing up for fancy dinners, exploring six different islands, having spontaneous adventures, leisurely reading on the sun deck, late-night dancing, tropical drinks, sleeping in until whenever we want, uninterrupted conversations, and enjoying my ever-so-awesome husband.

I am so excited, my eyes have been bulging out of their sockets, and I've been literally dreaming of lying on a warm beach in Barbados.

I'll be back in a week, all rested and beachy-brown. See you soon!

Life-Giving & Life-Draining Things

Every night (or at least on most nights), I take a few minutes to reflect on my day. Usually I do this as I lie in bed, before falling asleep. Two questions I consider are:

1) What was life-giving today?
2) What was life-draining today?

As I've practiced this nighttime ritual, I've become more aware of the rhythms and flow my life. I've recognized the things that tire me and energize me. This reflection habit also helps me to review my day, pay attention to emotions, practice gratitude, and be aware of the larger themes of my life. More and more, I am learning about what brings deep joy to my life, and creating space to experience those things in the midst of work, rest and family.

Life-Giving Things

1. Taking a nap
2. Going outside for a walk
3. Exercise
4. Family time with my husband and son
5. Doing one thing at a time
6. Playing hide-and-go-seek with my son
7. Time with my inner-most circle of friends
8. Cooking and baking
9. Getting at least 8 hours of sleep
10. Massaging my shoulders and neck
11. Blogging
12. Meeting with my spiritual director
13. Reading fiction 
14. Going out on a date with my husband
15. Taking a hot bath
16. Joining or guiding others in their pursuit of God
17. Spontaneous dance parties
18. Gardening
19. De-cluttering and simplifying
20. Visiting the farmer's market

 Life-Draining Things

1. Picking up clutter and mess around the house
2. Comparing myself to others
3. Advertisements
4. Taking a trip to the post-office
5. Multitasking
6. Having more than one or two appointments/meetings on any given day
7. Sitting in traffic
8. Joyless, complaining, or self-focused people
9. Shopping malls
10. Waking up to the sound of garbage trucks at 6:30am

What are some of the life-giving or life-draining things in your life?

Lemony Lemon Bread

 Life is not complex. We are complex. Life is simple,
and the simple thing is the right thing.
- Oscar Wilde

Life can seem complicated at times, and in those moments, a good dose of simplicity is often the perfect antidote. Simple things like taking a leisurely walk in nature, eating a piece of perfectly ripened fruit, or handwriting a letter to a loved one are reminders that life is full of simplicity and beauty.

In my more hectic, overwhelming moments, I need to pause and do something simple. On one such recent occasion, I made lemon bread. This quick bread is a no-fuss recipe that fills the kitchen with warm fuzzies and citrus scents as it bakes. The lemon zest and poppy seeds fill the moist bread with lots of flavor, making it a wonderful breakfast or midday snack.

Bake this bread and share some with a friend. I promise your life will seem pleasantly more simple.

Lemony Lemon Bread (from Family Meals by Maria Helm Sinskey)

print this recipe

2 1/4 cups all-purpose flour

1 teaspoon baking powder

1/4 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 teaspoon salt

1/2 cup sour cream

1/2 cup milk

2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice

1/2 cup unsalted butter, at room temperature

1 cup sugar

1 packed tablespoon grated lemon zest

2 large eggs

1/4 cup poppy seeds

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Butter an 8-by-4-inch loaf pan, and then dust with flour, tapping out the excess. In a bowl, stir together the flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. In another bowl, whisk together the sour cream, milk, and lemon juice. In the bowl of a stand mixer, using the paddle attachment, beat together the butter, sugar, and lemon zest on medium-high speed until light and fluffy. Stop the mixer and scrape down the sides of the bowl. Add the eggs, one at a time, beating after each addition until fully incorporated. Again, scrape down the sides of the bowl. On low speed, add the flour mixture in 2 additions alternately with the sour cream mixture in 2 additions, beginning with the flour mixture and mixing just until incorporated. Add the poppy seeds, increase the speed to high, and beat for 5 seconds to mix well. Scoop the batter into the prepared pan. Bake until a toothpick inserted into the center of the loaf comes out clean, about 50 minutes. Turn out onto a rack, and let cool before serving. Makes one loaf.